The list for August 27, 1998
The Top 14 Signs You’re at a Bad Air Show
- It’s running way behind schedule after 2 1/2 hours of blimp stunt flying.
- While loop-de-looping over the audience, the “Amazing Olestra Wingwalker” leaves some accidental “vapor trails.”
- Highlight of show is flyover by TelStar Model XC29-3 Communications Satellite .
- The only Stealth Bomber is someone in the crowd who obviously had a burrito for lunch.
- You’re watching the show from a ski-gondola in the Italian Alps.
- “Blue Angels” run around the runway with their arms out in a line making motor noises with their lips.
- Low-flying daredevil aerobatics accompanied by the lilting strains of “Rocky Mountain High.”
- For the kids: free balloon rides with master balloonist Steve Fossett.
- Hey! Is that a rope around Peter Pan’s waist?
- Final score: Girl Scout Skeet Shooting Team 3, Blue Angels 0
- “Fifi the Wing-Walking Poodle” has tell-tale nail holes in her feet.
- Skywriting exhibition consists of the letter “I” and a lower case “l”.
- “Stealth fighter” exhibit looks suspiciously like an empty field.
And the Number 1 Sign You’re at a Bad Air Show…
- “Flying Tigers” show turns out to be 37 stray kittens and a catapult.
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CREDITS
Selected from 114 submissions from 42 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA — 1, 12 (18th #1/Hall of Famer)
- Dave George, Arlington, VA — 1 (10th #1)
- Patrick Major, Dallas, OR — 2
- Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, VA — 2 (Hall of Famer)
- Jeff Downey, Raleigh, NC — 2, 4
- John Hering, Alexandria, VA — 3 (Hall of Famer)
- Don Swain, Pontiac, MI — 5
- Andrew Thomas, Omaha, NE — 6, 9
- Spike Jones, Atlanta, GA — 7
- Larry G. Hollister, Concord, CA — 8, 14, RU List Name
- Martell Stroup, Boston, MA — 9
- Marshal Perlman, Minneapolis, MN — 10
- Carla Brandon, San Diego, CA — 11, 13
- Marsha Clodfelter, Corpus Christi, TX — Topic
- Kenny Wolf, Wantagh, NY — Elevator operator
- Chris White, New York, NY — List owner/editor
- Lynyrd Skynryd, Jacksonville, FL — Ambience
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