The list for January 30, 1997
The Top 17 Least Known Sayings of Confucius
- Do the hokey pokey and you shake it all about — that’s what it’s all about!
- I’m tellin’ ya, Man — I could *easily* kick Nostradamus’ ass.
- Ain’t no cat like Miles, for like… the quality of notes he puts into the space. (Quoted during Confucius’ Beat period.)
- Your temple or mine?
- One who knows not pain and suffering of great magnitude has never paid eight bucks to see a Pauly Shore movie.
- The superior man kicks the photographer when no one looks.
- Man who bet on AFC in Super Bowl is no smarter than man who wears designer shoes when killing wife.
- Red China looks like crap with yellow tablecloth.
- Only by perfect virtue can the perfect path be made a fact — am I going to fast for you?
- I’m not gonna pay a lot for this muffler!
- Teach a man to fish, then sleep with his wife when he’s gone.
- No shirt, no shoes, no karma!
- The journey of a thousand laughs begins with a list of five.
- Don’t eat that!!!
- It may profit a man to market a doll that laughs when tickled or that chews hair, but he who markets inflatable doll that laughs while chewing hair will grow rich beyond all imagining.
- Light a match, for cryin’ out loud!
And the Number 1 Least Known Saying of Confucius…
- Garcon! Fetch me some more Saki, Saki, Bo-Baki, Banana Fana Fo-Faki, Me Mi Mo-Maki — Saki. And can I get one of those cute little umbrella thingies?
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CREDITS
Selected from 124 submissions from 46 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Sam Evans, Charleston, SC — 1 (5th #1)
- Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, VA — 2
- Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD — 3
- Brian Wilson, New York, NY — 4 (Rookie, sort of)
- Paul Schindler, Orinda, CA — 5
- Christopher Troise, New York, NY — 6
- Ed Brooksbank, Sacramento, CA — 7
- Matt Diamond, Holland, PA — 8, 14, Topic
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 8
- Jeff Downey, Raleigh, NC — 9
- Glenn Marcus, Washington, DC — 10
- JB Leibovitch, Oakland, CA — 11
- Paul Seaburn, Houston, TX — 12
- Caroline Gennity, Virginia Beach, VA — 13
- Kris Johnson, Burbank, CA — 15
- Marshal Perlman, Minneapolis, MN — 16
- Paul Paternoster, Redwood City, CA — 17
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