Better Names for the COVID-19 Virus

The list for March 24, 2020
NOTE FROM CHRIS:
In response to our first new list last week, we received
many emails from people who were happy to see the old
Top5/HumorLabs gang back in their inbox once again.
But we also received a few unsubscribes accompanied by messages
like, “HOW DARE YOU? THIS IS NO LAUGHING MATTER!!!”

We understand some people might feel that way, and if
you’re among them, please bear in mind that we’re not your
government and definitely not in charge of anything (thank God!).
We’re just trying to give people a little break from the craziness.

Now then…

We say it’s time to rename this
COVID-19 virus to something more fun.

The Top 16 Better Names
for the COVID-19 Virus

  1. Helter-Shelter-in-Place Virus

  2. Introvert’s Revenge

  3. Coughy McTouchy Face

  4. Blue Donkey Faux Fever

  5. Wuhan Rouge

  6. There Goes My Retirement Flu

  7. The Maybe Science Was Right Afterall Virus

  8. Wall Street Kryptonite

  9. The ESPNo Longer Relevant Pneumonia

  10. I Can’t Believe It’s Not Bubonic!

  11. Autoneurotic Asphyxiation

  12. Banish Flu

  13. COWORKWITH-19CATS

  14. Frank

  15. The Chicken-Nuggets-AGAIN? Pox
And the Number 1 Better Name for the COVID-19 Virus…

  1. The Amazon Finally Takes Over ALL of Retail Plague
.
CREDITS
Selected from 109 submissions from 42 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:

  • Mark Weiss, Austin, TX — 1 (44th #1)
  • Tom Stoudt, Fort Washington, PA — 2
  • Greg Preece, Toronto, Canada — 3
  • Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA — 4
  • Gene Dieden, Chicago, IL — 5, 12
  • Jim G. Phynn, Horsham, PA — 6
  • Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA — 7
  • Mark Zinck, Grand Rapids, MI — 8, 15
  • Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 9
  • Paul Wiley, Westtown, NY — 10
  • Jim Woodruff, Hoover, AL — 11
  • Chuck Salerno, North Chelmsford, NY — 13
  • Slick Sharkey, Clayton, GA — 14
  • Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL — 15
  • Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA — 16
  • Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA — 16
  • Chris White, Olympia, WA — List moderator, Banner Tag
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