The list for March 3, 1997
The Top 15 Things Overheard
in the Lincoln Bedroom

  1. “Hon, do you have any change… the ‘Magic Fingers’ only takes hundreds.”

  2. “Dammit Dole, stay with your tour group!”

  3. “Come on, baby! Emancipate me! Right here! Right now!”

  4. “So, the leader of the free world can’t get friggin’ cable?!?”

  5. “Couldn’t they find another room to put Sock’s litter box in?”

  6. “I’m sorry — I guess I’m just nervous with that Secret Service guy watching us.”

  7. “Bad dreams or not, Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to get back to your own bed!”

  8. “Hello, Mr. Yeltsin? Do you have Prince Albert in a can?”

  9. “Is that a stovepipe hat under your robe or are you just glad to see me?”

  10. “Meee-eeee aaaa-aand Mrs… Mrs Jones, Mrs Jones, Mrs Jones…”

  11. “Room service? More egg rolls, please.”

  12. “Look, Honey, I found a copy of ‘Playboy’s Girls of the Civil War’ under the mattress!”

  13. “What was that, four score and seven *seconds*?”

  14. “Hurry up, fer Christsake, Mary! I gotta abolish slavery in the morning!”
And the Number 1 Thing Overheard in the Lincoln Bedroom…

  1. “Mrs. Roosevelt, are you’re trying to seduce me?”
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CREDITS
Selected from 116 submissions from 44 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:

  • Paul Seaburn, Houston, TX — 1, 5 (3rd #1)
  • Sue Prifogle, Rushville, IN — 2 (Rookie!)
  • Rob Seulowitz, New York, NY — 3
  • Jeffrey House, Detroit, MI — 4
  • Bob Mader, Knoxville TN — 6
  • Sam Evans, Charleston, SC — 7, 13
  • Alexander Clemens, San Francisco, CA — 8
  • Blair Bostick, Alexandria, VA — 9, 15, Topic
  • Paul Paternoster, Redwood City, CA — 10
  • Don Horton, Sacramento, CA — 11
  • Caroline Gennity, Virginia Beach, VA — 11
  • Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, VA — 12
  • Jennifer Ritzinger, Seattle, WA — 12
  • Phil Doyle, Mercer Island, WA — 12
  • Kim Moser, New York, NY — 13
  • Marianne Tatom, Austin, TX — 13
  • George Olson, Colorado Springs, CO — 13
  • Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 14
  • Tony Hill, Minneapolis, MN — 15
  • Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD — 15
  • Steve Hurd, San Ramon, CA — 15
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