The list for May 6, 2020
The Top 16 Things Overheard
in Online School Classes
in Online School Classes
- "Miss Watson, your face looks weird without tons of make-up on it."
- "Billy, please tell me that’s a whoopee cushion I keep hearing."
- "Yes, Kayla, you may use the bathroom. WAIT, FIRST PUT DOWN YOUR PHONE!"
- "My dad says I only have to pretend to listen."
- "Pssst! At 11:00 we"re all going to drop our Chromebooks on the floor. Pass it along!"
- "Students, I can read all your private comments. And just for the record, I am not a dumb whore."
- "Today in wood shop class we will be making an air guitar."
- "Miss Jenkins? I don’t feel so good. May I be please be excused to log on to WebMD?"
- "Sorry, Jimmy, I checked the calendar and it’s NOT no pants day!"
- "Okay, kids, time to take a 5-minute break for anybody who needs to potty, and so that I can reconsider my life choices."
- "Homework? No, the dog ate my memory stick."
- "Before we begin this class on Elizabethan poetry, please be aware that, from time to time, my cat will exhibit his butthole on camera."
- "Todd, your ‘Todd’s Butt’ background is inappropriate."
- "Jimmy, I know I said you could do your video report anywhere, but I’m getting dizzy. Please get off the trampoline."
- "Miss Jenkins, how come our houses look so much nicer than yours?"
And the Number 1 Thing Overheard in Online School Classes…
- "Now students, please click on the PayPal logo in the lower right hand corner of your screen and enter an amount equivalent to the grade you would like to receive."
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CREDITS
Selected from 92 submissions from 33 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Dave Henry, Slidell, LA — 1, 10 (41st #1)
- Paul Wiley, Westtown, NY — 2
- David G. Scott, Kansas City, MO — 3
- Slick Sharkey, Clayton, GA — 4
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 4
- Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA — 5
- Paul Schindler, Orinda, CA — 6
- Whit Watson, Winter Park, FL — 6
- Michael Whitmire, Houston, TX — 7
- Gretchen Kinka, Brookfield, IL — 8
- Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA — 9, 12
- Brandon Eldridge, St. Louis, MO — 11
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ — 13, 15
- Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL — 14
- Kim Moser, New York, NY — 14
- Chris White, Olympia, WA — List moderator, Banner Tag
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