The list for January 7, 1998
The Top 14 Surprises in
Queen Elizabeth’s Financial Records
(Part II)
Queen Elizabeth’s Financial Records
(Part II)
- £10 million earned off the Queen’s steamy one-on-one chat line: 1-900-KNITE-ME
- Large expenses listed as "Boy Toys" explained as presents for the princes.
- She saves a pretty penny as a faithful coupon clipper.
- Gold and gem encrusted toilet for Prince Charles may be the only royal throne he’ll ever sit on.
- Finally, an explanation for David Hasselhoff’s success in Europe!
- Apparently, Balmoral Castle is where she stores all that Amway stuff she wasn’t able to sell.
- That ol’ Queen can NOT pick the ponies!
- Every Thursday night, it’s the same thing — Pizza! Pizza! and a Benny Hill video.
- Weekly vibrator repair budget exceeds GNP of Norway.
- No income whatsoever from royalty payments for Mattel’s Windsor Family Action Figures.
- 25% of food budget spent on beef jerky and Mentos.
- 32,000 for edible chocolate scepters.
- Spends 75% more on dowdy hats than on frumpy hats.
And the Number 1 Surprise in Queen Elizabeth’s Financial Records…
- Sadly, entire royal fortune now consists of 67 cents, a Fig Newton, some pocket lint and a rubber chicken.
.
CREDITS
Selected from 130 submissions from 47 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Kris Kettner, Fond du Lac, WI — 1 (1st #1!)
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 2
- Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD — 3
- Peter Bauer, Rochester, NY — 4
- John Voigt, Chicago, IL — 5, 7
- David W. James, Los Angeles, CA — 5
- Phil Doyle, Mercer Island, WA — 6
- Erich Voice, Chicago, IL — 6
- Fred Hesby, Portland, OR — 8
- Rob Seulowitz, New York, NY — 9
- Mitch Patterson, Atlanta, GA — 10
- Gene Markins-Dieden, New Haven, CT — 11
- Tony Hill, Minneapolis, MN — 12
- John Gennity, Woodhaven, NY — 13
- David Kass, Brooklyn, NY — 14
- Don Swain, Pontiac, MI — Topic
- Doug Rendall, Winthrop Harbor, IL — Banner Tag
- Chris White, New York, NY — List owner/moderator
- Pink Floyd, London, England — Ambience
T5010798
