The list for August 20, 1997
The Top 15 Surprises in “G.I. Jane”

  1. Jane assigned to the Armored Division when a general comments that she “would look mighty good in a tank top.”

  2. Demi court-martialed for “conduct unbecoming a stripper.”

  3. George Hamilton stars as womanizing Commander-in-Chief Bill Clinton.

  4. Although she is below the other soldiers in rank, she still manages to get them all to stand at attention.

  5. First there was Sigourney Weaver, and now it’s official: Guys dig bald chicks!

  6. Moving scene in which Jane is awarded the Bronze Tassel.

  7. While doing one-arm pushups, Demi uses other arm to slam tequila shooters.

  8. Government issued breasts don’t perform as well as civilian breasts.

  9. Nude scene with G.I. Jane showing G.I. Joe *her* Kung-Fu grip edited out to avoid NC-17 rating.

  10. Entire Joe Eszterhaus-penned script consists of hazing scenes where they push medals into Demi’s chest.

  11. Strangely familiar final line: “We’ll always have Paris Island.”

  12. Special cameo by Jim Carrey as wacky Navy gynecologist.

  13. Gristled old drill sergeants played by Demi’s mom and a buffed Bea Arthur.

  14. First choice for the role? Tom Cruise.
And the Number 1 Surprise in “G.I. Jane”…

  1. Under water, no one can hear your acting suck.
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CREDITS
Selected from 93 submissions from 36 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:

  • David G. Scott, Kansas City, MO — 1 (5th #1)
  • Hank Weilevy, Fairless Hills, PA — 2
  • Ed Brooksbank, Sacramento, CA — 3
  • David Kass, Brooklyn, NY — 3
  • Paul Paternoster, Redwood City, CA — 4, 6
  • Lloyd Jacobson, Washington, DC — 5, 12
  • Alan Smithee, Sugar Land, TX — 6
  • Martell Stroup, Reno, NV — 7
  • Ed Smith, Chattanooga, TN — 8, 13, 15
  • Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA — 9
  • Sue Prifogle, Rushville, IN — 10
  • Phil Doyle, Mercer Island, WA — 11
  • Marsha Clodfelter, Corpus Christi, TX — 14
  • Jennifer Ritzinger, Seattle, WA — Topic
  • Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD — Banner tag
  • Helen Reddy, Aspen, CO — Ambience
T5082097