The list for January 26, 1998
The Top 16 Surprises at the Bud Bowl Game
- Bud Team forfeits when several of its players check into Betty Ford Clinic at half-time.
- Bud Lite’s quarterback disqualified when his pre-game drug test comes back negative for alcohol.
- Defensive back goes berserk after one too many “Butt Lite” insults.
- New Bud coach, Sam Adams, has a pretty good head on him.
- Half-baked home viewers stoked by introduction of Ganja Bud, newest addition to Team Lite.
- Bud Lite quarterback’s ill-advised-but-foamy celebratory headbutt against the goal post.
- First, ever, use of special live “cup cam.”
- Bud Lite comes out on top by pulling the highly controversial “Kill a Fraternity Pledge” play in the final seconds of the game.
- Bud running-back humiliated when ripped pants reveal he’s actually a micro-brew.
- Eligibility controversy when Team Dry tries to bring in a pint of Guinness at halfback.
- Pete Rose feverishly cheering for Bud Lite.
- Bottles hitting each other isn’t the only tinkling going on.
- Halftime show features Spice Girls, with new octogenarian member, Old Spice.
- Michael “Bud” Irvin disqualified after crack found in his bottle.
- Kelsey Grammer visits sideline and chugs entire defensive team.
And the Number 1 Surprise at the Bud Bowl Game…
- For *some* reason, the Clydesdales get all the chicks.
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CREDITS
Selected from 77 submissions from 29 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Jim Rosenberg, Greensboro, NC — 1 (4th #1)
- Beth Kohl, Chicago, IL — 2
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA — 2, 16
- Larry G. Hollister, Concord, CA — 3
- Alan Smithee, Sugar Land, TX — 4
- Craig Stacey, Lisle, IL — 4
- Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA — 5
- Tony Hill, Minneapolis, MN — 6
- Don Swain, Pontiac, MI — 7, 12
- Mark Schmidt, Santa Cruz, CA — 7
- David Kass, Brooklyn, NY — 8, 15
- R.M. Weiner, Somerville, MA — 9
- Marsha Clodfelter, Corpus Christi, TX — 10
- Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD — 11, 14
- Kevin Freels, Sun Valley, CA — 13
- Annie Fisher, Philadelphia, PA — Topic
- Larry Mills, Oneonta, NY — Banner Tag
- Waylon Jennings, Tulsa, OK — Ambience
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