The list for September 17, 1996
The Top 15 Supreme Court Practical Jokes
- Out with the legal brief, in with the legal thong!
- Leave the seat up for Justices O’Connor and Ginsberg.
- Clarence sat through the entire morning session with an “Impeach Me” sign taped to the back of his robe.
- Rehnquist always sneaking references to Baywatch into his dissenting opinions.
- “Officially” changed national anthem to “Gangsta’s Paradise” and re-worded Pledge of Allegiance to say “One nation under Coolio.”
- Solemnly telling death row inmates they’ve overturned their conviction and then yelling, “PSYCHE! Turn on the juice!”
- Tell the guys at Court TV that the Supreme Court will rule on the existence or nonexistence of Santa Claus this Christmas.
- Load everybody into Souter’s Taurus and drive by Bork’s house blasting Aerosmith and honking the horn.
- Secretly replacing the courtroom’s Secret Service guard with Rusty the Bailiff.
- Calling up Dominoes and sending 55 pizzas to the White House when the President is hosting a State Dinner.
- Replace U.S. law books with Singapore law books and watch the wackiness ensue.
- Can of white paint over Justice Thomas’ chamber door just as funny now as it’s always been.
- Spend a couple of days on your deathbed, just to get the President’s hopes up.
- Announce the decision to hear the controversial case of Spy vs. Spy.
And the Number 1 Supreme Court Practical Joke…
- Radio-controlled “whack-a-mole” too much for any gavel-holding judge to resist.
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CREDITS
Selected from 98 submissions by 28 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Nancy Matus, Encinitas, CA — 1 (3rd #1)
- Lloyd Jacobson, Washington, DC — 2
- Matt Diamond, Holland, PA — 3
- Alexander Clemens, San Francisco, CA — 4
- John Voigt, Chicago, IL — 5
- Spike Jones, Atlanta, GA — 6
- Marshal Perlman, Minneapolis, MN — 7
- George Olson, Colorado Springs, CO — 8
- Robin Starveling, Dallas, TX — 9 (Rookie!)
- Caroline Gennity, Virginia Beach, VA — 10
- Meredith Ogden, Ithaca, NY — 11
- Greg Pettit, Houston, TX — 12
- Rob Seulowitz, New York, NY — 13 (Rookie!)
- Dennis Koho, Keizer, OR — 14
- Kathleen Buchanan, Tuscaloosa, AL — 15
- Sam Evans, Charleston, SC — Topic
- Chris White, NY, NY — Listmeister
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