The list for May 13, 1997
The Top 16 Signs You’re Hopelessly Geeky
- Your screen saver: “Deep Blue Kicks Ass!”
- You spend hours prioritizing your list of questions you’d like to ask Commander Data if you ever meet him in person.
- At the local Radio Shack, you’re greeted like Norm at Cheers.
- You’re the head A/V technician on a space ship behind Hale-Bopp.
- You receive a grant from the International Plaid Foundation.
- You’re 42 years old and you use the word “Wookie” at least a dozen times a day.
- Slim Jims and Ding Dongs form the base of your nutrition pyramid.
- Seven years, $60 million, and your new high-tech house still ain’t done.
- You have electrical tape holding your contact lenses together.
- You prefer to be thought of as an “artist who works in the medium of ASCII.”
- Discussions with your friends about the properties of dilithium crystals routinely lead to fistfights.
- Your favorite Marx Brother? Zeppo.
- You’re not geeky at all, and neither are your kids: McCoy, Sulu, Uhura, and Scotty.
- Your first and only attempt at foreplay ended abruptly when your own bow tie gave you a wedgie.
- You *ask* your mom to buy you Toughskins.
And the Number 1 Sign You’re Hopelessly Geeky…
- You know how to say “I can’t go swimming — I’ve eaten less than 2 hours ago.” in 5 languages.
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CREDITS
Selected from 149 submissions from 52 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA — 1 (5th #1)
- Caroline Gennity, Virginia Beach, VA — 2
- Martell Stroup, Reno, NV — 3 (Rookie!)
- Phil Doyle, Mercer Island, WA — 4
- Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, VA — 5
- Fred Hesby, Portland, OR — 6
- Lloyd Jacobson, Washington, DC — 7
- Sue Prifogle, Rushville, IN — 8
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 9, 14
- Tony Hill, Minneapolis, MN — 10
- Jason Anderson, Birmingham, AL — 11
- Randy Wohl, Ma’ale Adumim, Israel — 12
- Lisa Stepaniak, Dearborn, MI — 13
- Matt Loiselle, Detroit, MI — 15
- Doug Johnson, Santa Cruz, CA — 16
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