The list for November 25, 1997
The Top 16 Signs You’re Addicted
to "Baywatch"
to "Baywatch"
- Keep telling yourself you’ll quit after one more Yasmine Bleeth CPR scene.
- You finally trade in your beloved black Trans Am — for a red Toyota pickup.
- Hair like Hasselhoff. Sucked in gut like Hasselhoff. But your records don’t sell in Germany — *yet*.
- During your report at the big Board Meeting, you inadvertently say, "Gentlemen, the situation looks Bleeth."
- First time you’ve been to a beach in years, and everyone looks so… um, FAT.
- Burned-out Beach Boys aren’t the only ones with a sand box in the living room, Chester!
- Easily transfixed by anyone carrying a bowl of Jell-O.
- You win annual Christmas lighting contest with illuminated Pamela Anderson Lee on your roof.
- Although only 15 years old, this is your third year running AOL’s Baywatch chat forum.
- That red Speedo over your business suit is attracting a *lot* of attention from your co-workers.
- Much to your chagrin, the mere thought of David Hasselhoff triggers a Pavlovian "woody."
- Every morning, you powder your butt with sand instead of talc.
- Tendency to run in slow-mo to showcase your bouncing bosom is really just pissing off the other guys on your bowling team.
- Breast implants look funny on a guy, but now you can watch it in "Feel-O-Round."
- Your favorite Beatle? Yasmine!
And the Number 1 Sign You’re Addicted to "Baywatch"…
- While watching the news, you catch yourself wondering what the Unabomber would look like with a Speedo and a tan.
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CREDITS
Selected from 130 submissions from 51 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Tony Hill, Minneapolis, MN — 1 (16th #1)
- Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL — 2
- David W. James, Los Angeles, CA — 3
- Caroline Gennity, Virginia Beach, VA — 4
- Chris Gleason, Germantown, MD — 5
- David G. Scott, Kansas City, MO — 5, 10, 11
- Marsha Clodfelter, Corpus Christi, TX — 5, 9
- Greg Sadosuk, Fairfax, VA — 6
- Larry Baum, Hong Kong — 7 <
- Kevin Freels, Sun Valley, CA — 7
- Josh Fruhlinger, Oakland, CA — 7
- Spike Jones, Atlanta, GA — 8
- Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD — 10
- Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA — 12
- Jim Rosenberg, Greensboro, NC — 13
- Alexander Clemens, San Francisco, CA — 14
- Tom Louderback, Boston, MA — 15
- Paul Paternoster, Redwood City, CA — 16
- Dave Henry, Slidell, LA — Topic
- Chris White, New York, NY — List owner/editor
- Robert Palmer, Los Angeles, CA — Ambience
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