The list for November 10, 1997
The Top 15 Signs Barry Scheck Is Losing It
- Continually refers to nanny defendant as “Miss Drescher.”
- Claims Mark Fuhrman planted a bloody bib.
- Walks in wearing only boxers, clutching his trousers in his upraised fists, shrieking, “If my pants don’t fit, you must acquit!!”
- Giggles uncontrollably when asked if he’d like to poll the jury.
- Next high profile case? Top 5 List v. Girl Scouts of America
- Sprays on athlete’s foot medication then shouts “What about THAT, Mr. Fungus!?!”
- Responds to every judicial decision favorable to the defense by saying, “I’m lawyerrrrrific!”
- Keeps muttering “You win some, you lose some. Either way, you *still* get a zillion dollars.”
- Keeps trying to introduce scientific T&A evidence.
- Buoyed by his success in the O.J. trial, makes failed attempt to play the “Stuffy British Person card” in the nanny trial.
- His next case? Defending Kato Kaetlin against the charge of being a no-talent, pretty-boy freeloader!
- “Ladies and Gentlemen of the Jury… I have a live Cod in my shorts, and it’s doing the Macarena.”
- Points to his head and says, “Your Honor, I object to everything said by the ‘Bad Barry.'”
- He comes to work dressed only in a diaper, then tells judge he made a “blicky” and that he needs to be changed.
And the Number 1 Sign Barry Scheck Is Losing It…
- Grabs court reporter by the neck and screams, “TALK, DAMN YOU! TALK!”
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CREDITS
Selected from 95 submissions from 35 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Randy Wohl, Ma’ale Adumim, Israel — 1 (1st #1!)
- Marshal Perlman, Minneapolis, MN — 2
- Jim Rosenberg, Greensboro, NC — 3, 15
- Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA — 4
- Steve Hurd, San Ramon, CA — 5
- Geoff Brown, Farmington Hills, MI — 6, 13
- David Kass, Brooklyn, NY — 7
- Peter Bauer, Rochester, NY — 8, 15
- Peg Warner, Derry, NH — 9
- Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD — 10
- Beth Kohl, Chicago, IL — 11
- Jeff Downey, Raleigh, NC — 12
- Paul Paternoster, Redwood City, CA — 14
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA — Topic
- Eric Foster, Altamonte Springs, FL — Banner Tag
- Babyface, Los Angeles, CA — Ambience
T5111097
