The list for March 18, 2013
NOTE FROM CHRIS:
Grammy-winning rapper Lil Wayne is recovering
from a seizure at a hospital in Los Angeles.
from a seizure at a hospital in Los Angeles.
The Top 17 Signs a Rapper
Is Under the Weather
Is Under the Weather
- Instead of gunning down his rival’s entire entourage, he sends them a harshly worded e-mail flagged as "HIGH IMPORTANCE."
- He samples the Ricola horn in his latest record.
- Buys stock in and changes his name to "Puffs."
- Fifteen of his friends are sick, too.
- His beat-box routine last night ended with a monster loogie and a snot rocket.
- Officially changes his name to ZPac.
- He just bought the Mayo Clinic, Genentech and Dr. Oz.
- Purple Drank of choice? Dimetapp.
- Huge clock hanging from gold neckchain is replaced by box of Kleenex.
- Keeps asking what rhymes with "HUR-R-R-RGH."
- In his fevered state, he’s babbling incoherently using the King’s English.
- Drops a dookie instead of the mic.
- Seems rather ambivalent about the size of butts.
- Pulls the seat of his jeans up to mid-butt height because he’s "a tad chilly."
- Picks up his Grammy with a shout out to "the man who keeps me going, my gastroenterologist Dr. Hasim Rahmin."
- Unexpectedly rhymes "baby I got ta see ya" with "but I got da diarrhea."
And the Number 1 Sign a Rapper Is Under the Weather…
- "Bitch betta have my refill."
.
CREDITS
Selected from 96 submissions from 34 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- David E. Spiro, Tucson, AZ — 1 (5th #1)
- Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH — 2, 7
- Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 2
- Danny Gallagher, McKinney, TX — 3
- Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA — 4
- Paul Wiley, Westtown, NY — 5
- Richard Skora, Columbus, OH — 6
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 8
- Michael Whitmire, Houston, TX — 9
- John J. Brassil, Nashville, TN — 10
- Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA — 11
- Michael Cunningham, Woodridge, IL — 12, 14
- Nathan C. Sherman, Bellevue, WA — 13
- Mark Zinck, Grand Rapids, MI — 15
- Stephanie Landes, Findlay, OH — 16
- Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA — 17
- Donald Junter, New Haven, CT — Banner Tag
- Chris White, Olympia, WA — List owner/editor
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