Rejected Advertising Slogans for Summer Movies

The list for June 17, 1998
The Top 16 Rejected Advertising
Slogans for Summer Movies

  1. The X-Files: “The Merchandise is Out There.”

  2. Can’t Hardly Wait: “**** – Pedophile Weekly”

  3. The Horse Whisperer: “Filmed in Glorious Viagra-Rama”

  4. Almost Heroes: “Almost Watchable!”

  5. Godzilla: “His turds are bigger than your Winnebago.”

  6. The Horse Whisperer: “It’s like ‘The Electric Horseman’, but this time Bob’s only stunts involve bladder control.”

  7. Saving Private Ryan: “Serious-Schindler-Spielberg, Not Cool-Dinosaurs-Spielberg.”

  8. The Horse Whisperer: “Just keepin’ the chicks happy between asteroids.”

  9. Hope Floats: “Never mind the Sex Pistols; here’s the Bullock”

  10. Godzilla: “The last time a film sucked this much, Traci Lords was in it.”

  11. 6 Days, 7 Nights: “Try to guess what Anne Heche is thinking about while she kisses Harrison Ford!”

  12. The Horse Whisperer: “Take Your Woman To See This, And She’ll Owe You Sex For Months!”

  13. Black Dog: “No one with a three digit IQ admitted without a country & western singer.”

  14. The X-Files: “Like you could stay away if you tried, Nerd Boy!”

  15. He Got Game: “But he ain’t got passing SAT scores!”
And the Number 1 Rejected Advertising Slogan for a Summer Movie…

  1. A Perfect Murder: “Two Thumbs Up! – O.J.”
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CREDITS
Selected from 112 submissions from 43 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:

  • Carla Brandon, San Diego, CA — 1 (1st #1!)
  • Peter Bauer, Rochester, NY — 2
  • R.M. Weiner, Somerville, MA — 3
  • M.J. Finan, Cleveland, OH — 4
  • Michelle Burke, San Francisco, CA — 5
  • Paul Schindler, Orinda, CA — 6
  • Shel Rozan, Montreal, Quebec, Canada — 7 (Rookie!)
  • Larry G. Hollister, Concord, CA — 8, RU List Name
  • David Kass, Brooklyn, NY — 9, Topic, Banner Tag
  • Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA — 10
  • John Treusch, Burlington, NJ — 11
  • Kevin Freels, Sun Valley, CA — 12
  • Boyd Johnson, San Diego, CA — 13
  • Lloyd Jacobson, Washington, DC — 14
  • Matt Chaput, Calgary, Alberta, Canada — 15
  • Rob Seulowitz, New York, NY — 16
  • High Llamas, Cork, Ireland — Ambience
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