The list for May 6, 1996
NOTE FROM CHRIS:
Just when you thought it was safe to go near your keyboard…
We are back! The Top 5 List returns from its hiatus with some
great news: We have joined forces with Windows Sources magazine
to ensure that you’ll never again have to drink your morning
coffee without a brand spanking new Top 5 List to read. Windows
Sources magazine is now our official sponsor, and with their
help, The Top 5 Web Site should soon become a reality as well.
We’ll keep you updated on the construction of this puppy.
And now, without further ado, we begin a new era of malarky and
nonsense. Fasten your seat belts, kids, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride!
The Top 15 Reasons for the Extended
Absence of the Top 5 List
Absence of the Top 5 List
- Two words: OJ overdose!
- Flawed Pentium chip on new computer kept generating “Top 4.968 List.”
- Moderator went into hiding after frighteningly unsuccessful date with Courtney Love.
- If you want the reasons, call the 800 number for my videotape — only $29.00!
- One word: Hemorrhoids!
- Lambada — the Forbidden Dance!
- That new Extra-Strength Ex-Lax works just a little TOO well.
- Moderator, tired of waiting for a chance to show his ass on “NYPD BLUE,” decided Top 5 was an alternate way of acomplishing the task.
- Construction delays during the remodeling of the Ed Sullivan website.
- Damn K-Mart alarm clock!
- Listus interruptus.
- Extended absence? What extended absence? ABBA — now THERE’S an extended absence.
- Moderator’s mother found the phone bill.
- The women from “Friends” have finally learned how to do their own hair.
And the Number 1 Reason for the Extended Absence of the Top 5 List…
- Absence schmabsence — the point is WE’RE BACK!!
.
CREDITS
Today’s list authors were:
- Roger P. Ciotti, Kenosha, WI — 1 (Hall of Fame)
- Steve Hurd, San Ramon, CA — 2, 6, 13
- Paul Schindler, Orinda, CA — 4, 10
- Bill Mains, whereabouts unknown — 5
- Peter Friedman, Dartmouth — 6
- Steven Berry, whereabouts unknown — 7
- Sam Evans, Charleston, SC — 8 (Hall of Fame)
- Greg Sherwin, Palo Alto, CA — 9
- Paul Henne, Landover, MD — 11
- Michael Wolf, Bronx, NY — 12
- Chris White, New York, NY — 14
- Everyone, everywhere — 15
T5050696