Interesting Ways Humanity Could Be Wiped From the Face of the Earth

The list for May 13, 2013
The Top 15 Interesting Ways Humanity Could
Be Wiped From the Face of the Earth

  1. The last taxpayer on the planet finally quits his job and everyone starves to death.

  2. The world’s dogs and cats finally get fed up with crappy food and collectively switch to a meatier diet.

  3. By 2014, the Cinnamon Challenge kills all seven billion humans.

  4. 2045: President Boo-Boo decides she’s had jus’ about enuff of the sass comin’ outta that stuck-up German Chancellor’s pie-hole.

  5. Remember that inexhaustible supply of solar energy? Turns out it wasn’t.

  6. Thanks to science, we now understand the other gender so well that we want nothing to do with them ever again.

  7. Joe Biden confuses his Wii remote with the Doomsday Button and accidentally launches nuclear warheads toward the Middle East.

  8. Just as the last holdout becomes a belieber, Justin reveals himself as the Anti-Christ.

  9. The ill-conceived "Mentos-in-Coke-Bottles-Across-America."

  10. Kardashian vaginas turn to stone anyone who sees one — which eventually is pretty much, well, everyone.

  11. Those gay marriage opponents were right! It destroyed THE ENTIRE WORLD!!

  12. The water supply accumulates too much DDT, PCB, BPA, TCE, HAA, MTBE, PAH, PCDD, PCDF, DEHP, TBP, LAS, NPE, DBP, BBP, HCH, and AOX — and everyone dies of acronym poisoning.

  13. The return of the 570-million year cicada raptor.

  14. We had prepared for a "Planet of the Apes" scenario, but were completely blindsided by the "Planet of the Cuddly Bunnies" thing.
And the Number 1 Interesting Way Humanity Could Be Wiped From the Face of the Earth…

  1. The population literally explodes, thanks to McDonald’s hopelessly addictive new McMeth With Cheese.
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CREDITS
Selected from 57 submissions from 20 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:

  • SarahJayne Bennett, London, England — 1 (2nd #1)
  • Adela Branson, Soda Springs, ID — 2
  • Michael Cunningham, Woodridge, IL — 3, 10
  • Roy Skogstrom, Pepeekeo, HI — 4
  • Kim Moser, New York, NY — 5, 13
  • Jeremy Shelley, Possum Trot, KY — 6
  • Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA — 7, 12
  • Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH — 8
  • Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA — 9
  • Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia — 11
  • Lori Petterson, Fairfax, VA — 14
  • David Zechiel, Lake Forest, CA — 15
  • Bruce K. Skillin, Daegu, South Korea — Topic
  • Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ — Banner Tag
  • Chris White, Olympia, WA — List owner/editor
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