The list for May 8, 1997
The Top 15 Changes in England Under
a Non-Conservative Parliament
a Non-Conservative Parliament
- New head of British Intelligence? Austin Powers, International Man of Mystery.
- Scandal-plagued Windsors removed from throne, replaced by scandal-plagued Kennedys.
- Emma Thompson forced to return to her natural hair color.
- Driving on either side of the street now okay, if you know what I mean.
- Judges allowed to exchange wimpy white wigs for Dennis Rodman model.
- Steak & Kidney Pie replaced by Summer Vegetables & Kidney Pie.
- Beer will now be served cold, like God intended.
- Raisins added to gruel in school lunches.
- Maggie Thatcher “Swimsuit” Edition shower-curtains finally removed from Parliament locker-rooms.
- Secret plan to assassinate Spice Girls gets immediate funding.
- Time to do a little downsizing on Prince Charles’ ears.
- Government loan to Ringo to head off slide into Psychic Hotline commercials.
- Musicians union forced to admit Linda McCartney.
- Major cutbacks to their *BIIIG* SCAAARY ARMY!!!
And the Number 1 Change in England Under a Non-Conservative Parliament…
- Massive infrastructure project begun on citizens’ teeth.
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CREDITS
Selected from 102 submissions from 41 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 1 (9th #1)
- Dave George, Home Sweet Home — 2, 11
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA — 3
- David W. James, Los Angeles, CA — 4
- David G. Scott, Kansas City, MO — 5
- Phil Doyle, Mercer Island, WA — 6
- Jeffrey House, Detroit, MI — 7
- Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, VA — 8
- George Olson, Colorado Springs, CO — 9
- Matt Loiselle, Detroit, MI — 10
- Alan Wagner, Bayside, WI — 12
- Marianne Tatom, Austin, TX — 12
- Jennifer Ritzinger, Seattle, WA — 13
- Jason Anderson, Birmingham, AL — 14
- Steve Hurd, San Ramon, CA — 15
- Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD — 15
- Christopher Troise, New York, NY — Topic
- Gloria Monti, Milan, Italy — European Cultural Consultant (Rookie!)
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