Advantages to Having One Body Part Grafted Onto Another

The list for December 27, 2013
NOTE FROM CHRIS:
A Chinese factory worker who recently lost his
right hand in an accident at work was in luck
— doctors were able to save the limb by
temporarily grafting it to his ankle.

Supposedly, it’s a pretty common practice.
In fact, another guy had a replacement
nose growing out of his forehead.

Don’t believe me? Here’s video of both.

The Top 15 Advantages to Having One
Body Part Grafted Onto Another

  1. Brains in your crotch? Since that is the center of decision-making, maybe some higher-order thinking might help.

  2. That hand on your back is perfect for both self congratulatory pats *and* never-ending neck rubs!

  3. Unzip your pants and greet her with a friendly handshake!

  4. Albeit a little creepy, the eyes on the back of the head sure do make it easier to be a teacher.

  5. Head up your ass: It’s not strictly a metaphor any more!

  6. That well-placed hand lets you to do 3/4 of the Kama Sutra without ever getting up from your Barcalounger.

  7. With that third eye in the middle, your unibrow doesn’t look so awkward.

  8. Some guys might feel chastened when called a dickhead. You, my friend, can wear it as a badge of honor!

  9. That eyeball on your palm helps you reach down behind the sofa to look for that damn remote.

  10. Gals, save us all some time and just move those eyes to your boobs.

  11. "I’d love to pull my head out of there, Chris Matthews, but doctors orders."

  12. "… and THIS little piggy went weewee —- literally."

  13. Hoping to save your penis by grafting it to your eyelid would make you into a cockeyed optimist.

  14. Hands over your eyes? Great for watching NFL games! (Houston Texans fans only)
And the Number 1 Advantage to Having One Body Part Grafted Onto Another…

  1. Sure, you’re not getting much done at work, but pussyfooting has never been *this* much fun!
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CREDITS
Selected from 52 submissions from 18 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:

  • Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA — 1, 8 (96th #1)
  • David G. Scott, Kansas City, MO — 2
  • Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA — 3, 11
  • Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 4
  • Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 5
  • Richard Skora, Columbus, OH — 6
  • Travis Ruetenik, Hiroshima, Japan — 7, 13
  • Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA — 9
  • Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA — 10
  • Ellen Satter, Trumbull, CT — 12
  • Paul Wiley, Westtown, NY — 12, 14
  • Adela Branson, Soda Springs, ID — 14
  • David Zechiel, Lake Forest, CA — 14
  • Kevin Dopart, Washington, DC — 15
  • Donald Junter, New Haven, CT — Banner Tag
  • Chris White, Olympia, WA — List owner/editor
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